Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Thoughtful Thinks...for Brian.

This post is for my friend Brian, one of the most awesome people I have ever had the honour of knowing. We "knew" each other for a short time over a couple of summers but have managed to keep in touch through time and space, and I am a better person for knowing him.  


I am feeling better! Not great, but better. I slept the whole day yesterday...and it was amazing. I did watch some previous episodes of Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice I had saved on the PVR, but other than that it was a day of blissful sleep. I really needed it. I mean, if you can sleep for an entire day with really trying you must be tired and drained. 

I had a moment last week where I could feel a panic attack coming on because of al the things I have on the go and need to complete. I know I take on too much, I know I need to learn how to say "no" more often, and I am working on not feeling guilty about it. The problem is that I love my job and I really like doing stuff that goes along with it- coaching, being a staff advisor, creating the yearbook, researching new lessons, etc...but at some point I need to take time for me.

I think a lot of good people out there feel like this a lot of the time, and for the most part it's because they are very caring and compassionate people. They take on the problems of others and actively look for ways to help them because deep down inside they know they are strong enough to take care of themselves and the others around them (Brian, this is YOU!). There will come a time when they start to feel beat down by the stress of other's problems and emotions but they will always plough through because they have an emotional toughness, a caring tenacity, a passionate drive to be a good person and to spread that joy to those around them.

So even if you are feeling down and stressed right now know it is because you are such a great person that you feel like this. If you didn't care as much, try as hard, love as deeply- you wouldn't be you. And that would be a loss for the rest of us.


3 Thinks and Thoughts of Others:

SB said...

it's true...it's the ambivalent who have it easy in life. and who wants to be that????

you will get through this shitty-ass busy and grey time miss beth and will have grown as a result. good on you!

hcmurdoch said...

I SO connect with what you are saying! I did yearbook, was various clubs advisors, run a WASC focus group, etc. It is so tough to say no. But remember, you must also take care of yourself so that it doesn't all come crashing down around you!

Kristi said...

I love this perspective! You just gave me a much-needed boost...

Last Words...

Thinking is easy, acting is difficult, and to put one's thoughts into action is the most difficult thing in the world.

~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe