Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone

Friday, March 5, 2010

Conversations

(This post is probably only going to be ironic to me seeing as I have temporarily lost my voice due to some weirdo cold where my throat doesn't hurt but I cough like a 60 year-old smoker...fun times.)


I attended a workshop last night that I had been looking forward to for quite some time. Last year, I joined a professional community of mentors based on the work of Bruce Wellman. You can see my earlier post about it here, although I should warn you...it's not my best work! Just a passing mention of a few professional books.

The workshop last night was actually a book talk for a text called Fierce Conversations: Achieving Success at Work and in Life One Conversation at a Time by Susan Scott. I have been wanting to get my hands on it since I first learned about it and one of my favourite people in the teaching world read this passage to a group of gathered teachers...

Our lives succeed or fail gradually, then suddenly, one conversation at a time. While no single conversation is guaranteed to change the trajectory of a career, a business, a marriage, or a life, any single conversation can. The conversation is the relationship.

I love the idea behind this quote. If you think over the course of your life thus far you must have a millions upon millions of conversations and how many of them changed your life? The news of the death of a loved one? The announcement of a pregnancy? A proposal?

The main idea behind this book is about being present for each and very conversation we have and being prepared to participate fully in it. There are 7 principles outlined in the book, and I won't go into all of them, but at the book talk last night we each chose part of the book to read and then share our thoughts with the group as a whole. I read the sectioned titled "Let Silence Do the Heavy Lifting". It was al about taking the time to pause during a conversation and really think about what others are saying. A few points really stuck out to me...

"...the more emotionally loaded a subject, the more silence is required..." (page 223)

"...the space between thoughts is where insight can make itself known..." (page 227)


I am very excited to get more into this book and try some of the principles out during the conversations I have with my husband, my students and my co-workers. The idea of having really meaningful, important and fulfilling conversations is just fabulous. I think too often we are too busy getting on with life to really live, to slow down and have a great conversation with someone we love, that we adore,  that we once hung on their every word. I want to get back to that place.

7 Thinks and Thoughts of Others:

Mass Hole Mommy said...

Hi there! Happy Friday follow!

Kristi said...

I am really intrigued by this. Sounds like a great book. I love the idea of placing more value on the silence, so that you can appreciate what is being said.

Mom et al said...

Hi, I'm your newest Friday follower!

Come visit me at Mom-et-al.com

-Maria

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Melissa said...

This is really, really deep! Sometimes I get nervous in awkward silences and fill them with meaningless chatter...the power of silence can be great though...hmmm I like it! :)

bizzimommiofboyz said...

Happy Friday Follow

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Jan von Harz said...

Sounds very interesting and true too if you contemplate all the various conversations that changed your life good and bad. Hope you get your voice back soon. Have a great weekend

SB said...

sounds totally like my kind of read, Beth - very cool!
SB

Last Words...

Thinking is easy, acting is difficult, and to put one's thoughts into action is the most difficult thing in the world.

~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe