When I care about stuff, I care about it big time. I care all the way. With my whole heart and my whole self. There is no halfway with me and many times it comes back to bite me in the ass. I have a hard time taking things lightly and just putting my time in. I want things to go well, I want people to try their best, I want to have high standards and then work really hard to go over them. I care too much about a lot of things.
It's one of the things I like the best about me.
It's one of the things I like the least about me.
When I get upset, angry, sad, frustrated, disappointed, mad, outraged, indignant, incredulous, etc, etc I tear up. Every time. Since the beginning of time. It's so annoying and frustrating and embarrassing. I am a 30 year old woman who essentially cries when she doesn't get her way. Now, I know that isn't true but it's how it feels like it appears when I am at work dealing with a situation of complete unprofessionalism that rocks my world so completely that I am immediately angered, frustrated, disappointed. So what do I do? Cry. Tears.
Why can't I be icy. Frigid in my anger.
Why can't I shout and swear and let my feelings known to the world?
Why can't I think of supremely haughty things to say that will leave my listeners speechless?
Why do I always cry?
My sister says I feel too much, or that my emotions overwhelm me. Something like that. All I know is that I care a lot about my job, my career, my friends and my beliefs. And apparently I am willing to cry about it.